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Lectio > Psalm 139

July 12, 2011

“Investigate my life, O God,
      find out everything about me;
   Cross-examine and test me,
      get a clear picture of what I’m about;
   See for yourself whether I’ve done anything wrong—
      then guide me on the road to eternal life.” (Psalm 139.23,24)

Do I really want to be known this way? The first step to healing, the first step to growth, the first step to overcoming an addiction is seeing and admitting the truth. This is what Jesus, among others, calls “repentance.” John, one of Jesus’ closest friends called it bringing things into the light. In AA they talk about “admitting that we are helpless” and later taking an inventory of all known wrongs. And you know what? It works. Facing the truth though painful ultimately brings joy, happiness, healing, growth, freedom…

But our tendancy is the opposite. Our tendency is to hide, to cover ourselves, to protect ourselves, to ignore the truth, to avoid the vulnerability of being exposed. The first thing Adam and Eve did in the garden after disobeying God is hide. Men especially find this difficult. In our culture and most others for that matter, men are expected to project a stance of strength, of having it all together, of being fearless and in control. But we all know the truth. Inside every man is a little boy that is wounded, scared, needing to be accepted and desiring to be admired.

But this passage reminds me that God already knows me any way. There’s nothing hidden from him. And he can be trusted. Our weaknesses and secrets are safe with him – he knows them and he still loves us. But he wants us to know ourselves and become comfortable in his presence being honest and eventually even risk letting others know us.

+++ Lord, you know me and that is a terrifying thought! Yet you don’t despise me… in fact you still look on me – as I look at my kids – with compassion and care and loving concern. Help me to risk being known, being exposed. Bring my faults into the light of your gaze and purify me even as you are pure. Make me fit for your realm of righteousness, peace and joy. Fill me again with a fulness of your Spirit that I may know you and aid others in knowing you too. Amen. +++

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2 Comments leave one →
  1. July 12, 2011 11:18 am

    He looks at us with a heart FULL of love. May we continue to risk being exposed to the light of love. Thanks for the reminder.

    • July 13, 2011 10:20 am

      Thanks Sandie. You remind me of this often and well…. sometimes just through your presence….

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